What could you do this upcoming week that you won't fall for porn again?
That might include the following:
1) Make sure you won't have access to porn (like installing an internet filter, throw away porn magazines and the like).
2) Identify the triggers in your life (things and/or people that sexually arouse you) and try to get them out of your life.
3) Find out under what circumstances you usually fall (emotional, social or whatever else circumstances). That might help you find a pattern (for instance: if you usually fall when you are stressed out, seek healthier ways to deal with stress now).
4) Find out about the legitimate needs behind your lust (for instance the need for male affirmation) and seek ways to satisfy those needs a better way.
5) Find out about the underlying emotions. For example if you usually fall when you are angry, seek healthier ways to deal with your anger now.
"The problem with pornography" said Pope John Paul II, "is not that a man sees too much. It is that he sees so little."
Pope John Paul II
"People suffer from sexual obsession when sexual thoughts control them rather than being able to control the thoughts."
[Earl
Wilson, Sexual Sin' , p. 15] "To be controlled by anything other than
Jesus Christ is idolatry and therefore sinful." [ibid., p. 18]
Was soll man von 12-Schritte-Programmen halten?
Es gibt verschiedene Herangehensweisen an sexuelle Probleme. Als Christ sind aber sexuelle Probleme immer auch ein Ausdruck des gebrochenen Verhältnisses zu Gott - und deshalb ist es wichtig, dies wiederherzustellen. Stelle also klar, dass das Programm, an dem tu teilnimmst, auf der Bibel basiert. Lese täglich Gottes Wort, bete und suche die Gemeinschaft mit anderen Christen. Programme, die das nicht tun, solltest du ablehnen. Ein auf der Bibel basierendes 12-Schritte Programm ist aber sehr zu empfehlen.
Nimm dir einen Zettel und schreibe auf, wie du bisher versucht hast, deine sexuellen Sünden zu verbergen. Welche Auswirkungen hatte das auf deine geistige und emotionale Verfassung sowie allgemein dein Selbstvertrauen und Selbstwertgefühl?
Wie denkst du, hat Gott versucht, deine Aufmerksamkeit auf dieses Verhalten zu lenken (Gewissen, Umstände, Heiliger Geist...)?

Außerdem brauchst du noch eine ständige Motivation. Es ist meist nicht das Problem, richtig von falsch zu unterscheiden. Motiviert zu bleiben - das ist wahrlich schwierig! Beginne jeden Tag, indem du dich daran erinnerst, warum du mit deinem sexuell unmoralischen Verhalten aufhören willst. Du hast vielleicht nicht gleich frühmorgens die 100%-ige Motivation - aber du kannst sie dir holen, indem du täglich mit einer Wiederholung der Gründe, warum du aufhören sollst, beginnst.
Willenskraft alleine wird ungewolltes menschliches Verhalten nicht dauerhaft überwinden können. Willenskraft spielt sich im Kopf ab. Das Herz aber ist der Ort, wo Gefühle und Motivation ihren Ursprung haben. So kann man Probleme mit der Selbstkontrolle auch als Kampf zwischen Kopf und Herzen darstellen. Willenskraft alleine kann sogar den Teufelskreis aus Widerstehen, Nachgeben und neuem Entschluss nicht durchbrechen und so die ungewollten Sehnsüchte noch verstärken. Wir müssen die Kraft des Herzens nutzen. Dafür brauchen wir eine höhere Motivation, die das Herz so nachgiebig beeinflusst, dass es die schlechte Einstellung oder Verhaltensweise problemlos ersetzen und überwinden kann. Wir müssen vom wilden Bekämpfen zum Verfolgen von positiven Alternativen kommen.
Wenn es in meiner Gegend keine Selbsthilfegruppe gibt, soll ich selbst eine eröffnen?
Grundsätzlich ist es natürlich besser, einer bereits bestehenden Gruppe beizutreten. Wenn es aber gar nichts in der näheren Umgebung gibt, würde ich dir dringend raten, dem online-Programm von Homosexuals Anonymous beizutreten. Hier wirst du das nötige Know-How vermittelt bekommen, um selbst eine Gruppe zu eröffnen.
Telefonketten
Ein Tip aus der Praxis: Telefonketten. Besonders wirkungsvoll bei Selbsthilfegruppen, durchaus aber auch privat machbar. Sobald jemand in Gefahr ist, seinen Versuchungen nachzugehen, ruft er einen anderen Bruder (bzw. bei Frauen eine Schwester) an oder schickt eine SMS und setzt so die Kette in Gang. Die anderen versuchen schnellstmöglichst zu reagieren und ihn/sie davon abzuhalten (anrufen, bei ihm/ihr vorbeischauen usw.). Außerdem beginnen die Brüder/Schwestern, für ihn/sie zu beten.
Sehr
wirkungsvoll und hilfreich! Bestimmt kennst auch du Menschen, die das
für dich tun würden - und für die du dasselbe tun könntest!
Now, you may ask what burning cedar and sin have in common., or have one with the other other.
This morning I fed my wood stove early in the morning with some small cedar blocks to boost the heat output. Later on when I opened the door to add more firewood, bits of cedar hot coals spit out onto the floor.
It crossed my mind at that time that sin is just like that. When we open the door to sin, a small fire begins to grow in you. The more you add to it's pleasures, the hotter it gets. And when you try to close the door on it on your own, you are able to control it for a short time. But later on as temptation arises and you give in that temptation and open up the door once again, sin spits out at you with even more fury, consuming you. I had a hard time controlling the embers of coal that were spitting out at me. Each time I reached out and picked up one ember and opened the door to throw it back into the firebox, another ember spit out at me, and often a few more would
come at the same time, to the point that I was having a hard time to keep it under control. Isn't that just like sin. The more we play with it, the more it keeps coming at us.
The moral of this little story is, do not open the door to sin at any time. And if you have, then lock the door permanently to it, so that it cannot gain control over you ever again. The more you play with sin, the more it controls you. And the harder it is after the fact to get rid of it.
Remember, you cannot control sin, it controls you.
andre
Es dürfte schwer sein, dann noch sexuelle Gefühle für sie zu haben...
Versuchung und Vergebung
Versuchung wird es immer geben. Es muss sie sogar geben. Auch christlicher Sicht trennt Versuchung die Spreu vom Weizen. Was wir dagegen tun können? Es gibt Waffen, die jede Versuchung meistern helfen: Das Wort Gottes und das inständige Gebet. Die "Rüstung", um in den Kampf zu ziehen - und zu gewinnen!
Als Christen dürfen wir auch auf Vergebung hoffen. Sogar wir, die wir viel und häufig gesündigt haben, dürfen Vergebung erfahren. Und wie Jesus uns bereits gesagt hat: wem viel vergeben wurde, der liebt Jesus auch umso mehr.
Wir sollten diese Vergebung also auch annehmen und uns selbst vergeben. Und im Gegenzug denen, die uns verletzt haben.
Dass wir mit unseren christlichen Prinzipien nicht immer auf Verständnis und Gegenliebe stoßen werden, hat uns Jesus ebenfalls klar gemacht - kurz bevor er ans Kreuz geschlagen wurde.
Wenn die Menschen schon damals so gehandelt haben, als das Holz noch grün war, wie werden sie erst handeln, wenn das Holz trocken ist...
Titus 2:6, Hiob 31:1, 2 Timotheus 1:7
Guys,
I'd like to remind you of how important discipline is for recovery. Holding on to your program, your daily structure. Pursuing your goal - no matter how long it takes and how hard it will be. Learning to control your lust - and not let it control you.
God bless you,
Robert
Erotic dreams
NO! I WON'T!
Shirtless Men
Guys,
you might think sometimes what the heck - it is not sinful to look at pics with shirtless men on them. What's the big deal? It's not porn!
Well, let me tell you this: it is not porn for others - it sure is for you if it triggers you (and obvioulsy it does so!). You are not looking at them because you like the guy's pants. You WANT to see his nakes upper body!
SURE that is porn to you!
EVERYTHING that might be harmless to others will become temptation (or even sinful if you look for it on purpose) for you if it sexually arouses you.
And once you enter that road, the chain reaction begins: you want more, you click on other pages, you fantasize, you masturbate, you have sex.
The same with inappropriate second looks: FORCE yourself not to look twice if somebody or something turns you on!
Once you open that door a little bit, the devil sure won't miss his fat chance to get a foot in and push things harder.
Resist the devil and he will flee from you! He won't even call it a fight then!
God bless you,
Robert
When
Jesus told the woman to "go sin no more'., what did He mean? Did He
mean that she would not sin? I don't think so. I think that Jesus was
saying don't sin wilfully like you did before. We have sins of
omission, we forget to worship god and sins of comission, we cmit sin
and know it's wrong. Jesus sets us free from our past sins and asks us
as Christians to follow Him .. how often we fail to do this.
Yet to
sin and induce another to sin as well compounds the sin (makes the sin
worse). To know how to do right and then do wrong is sin. And we fall
short of the glory of God, God calls us to be 'holy' as He is holy. Our
sin takes us away from God and we break our fellowship with God. Sion
destroys our union with God. Of course we can confess our sins to God
abd He will forgive us and bleanse us, isan;t that great to know. But
we should as the Bible tells us to, "avoid sin", as God understands the
ramification of sin in our life.
We must practice our Christian
faith. Going to church will do noone any good, unless they are 'born
again'. Reading many books may give us knowledge but unless we apply
the knowledge gained our reading is in vain, much like our
Christianity, ubless we practice it we arestill "without hope and
without God' in this world.
Believe me I know that sin is powerful,
yet I have founda power greater than sin that has set me free. You also
can attain freedom by reading and doing and avoiding all places where
you may find sin.
Bill B.
(Quelle: u.a. Joe Dallas)
Links Porno
Wahre Liebe wartet
www.wahreliebewartet.de
Deutsches Institut für Jugend und Gesellschaft: Pornographie und Sexsucht
Nackte Tatsachen: http://www.nacktetatsachen.at/deutsch/index.php
SHG-Pornographieabhängigkeit: http://www.shg-pornographieabhaengigkeit.de/shg/index.php
sex-porno-erotik.ch sex (Infoseite)
sexsucht.jesus.ch
Männerforum Schweiz Internationale Männer-Bewegung
Jesus.CH News, Magazin, Ratgeber
Sex&Love Magazin von Jesus.ch
Endlich Leben
12 Schritte-Programm
nomoreporn.de
Lösungsstrategien aufgrund christlicher Grundlagen
Sex Addicts Anonymous
Anonyme Sexsüchtige
Porn-Free.org
Englischprachige Hilfeseite
Family
Familienmagazin
Wahre Liebe wartet
Rein in die Ehe
Livenet
Internetportal von Schweizer Christen
ERlebt
Kraft zur Veränderung
Pure Restoration
www.purerestoration.org
The Pure Restoration workshops help men of all ages better understand & recover from pornography addiction (including internet pornography) & infidelity. Pure Restoration.s co-creator Joe Dallas & his inspiring, results-oriented, 4-day recovery workshops have helped thousands of men over the last 3 years. If you are ready to take control of this problem instead of continuing to let it control you, then we can help.
Dads.org. Help for those struggling with pornography
True Love Waits Campaign
www.truelovewaits.com
MarriagePartnership.com
www.christianitytoday.com/marriage
Marriage Builders
www.pureintimacy.org
Emotional Abuse
http://www.myndtalk.org/htm/abuse.htm
Open Hearts Ministry
http://www.gospelcom.net/openhearts/
Spiritual Abuse Recovery Resources
www.spiritualabuse.com
Jim Hopper's Home Page
www.jimhopper.com
Be Broken
Covenant
Fires of Darkness
Porn Free
http://porn-free.org
www.porn-free.org
Pure Life Ministries
www.purelifeministries.org
Pure Restoration
www.purerestoration.com
Sex Addicts Anonymous
www.saa-recovery.org
Sexaholics Anonymous
www.sa.org
www.everymansbattle.com
At New Life Ministries we receive hundreds of calls every month from Christian men who are struggling to stay pure in the midst of daily challenges to their sexual integrity. We are committed to helping men win this battle for sexual purity, & have developed workshops for men, their wives, & pastors, all of which are focused on helping men achieve & maintain victory over these temptations.
www.everywomansbattle.com
The only way women can survive the intense struggle for sexual integrity is by guarding not just your body, but your mind & heart as well. Every Woman's Battle, an outreach of New Life Ministries, can help you learn to do that using real-life stories & examples from her own struggle, Shannon Ethridge helps women like you - whether married, engaged, or planning to marry someday.
Celebrate Recovery
www.celebraterecovery.com
Same-Sex Attraction Morality League (catholic)
www.thepainofporn.com
The horror that pornography has brought among wives and loved ones is real. Read the stories submitted by everyday wives, husbands, and even more sadly, children, telling of how their husband's or father's use of pornography has wounded them deeply and how for most, the wounds are just the beginning.
www.higher-calling.com
Christ-centered community abundant with hope for the sexually broken.
www.freeinchrist.truepath.com
Christ-Centered Men's Support | Be set free from sexual addiction | Great Resources
www.firesofdarkness.com
Reaching out to pornography addicts and the people who love them.
www.battleplanministries.org
Battle Plan Ministry (BPM) at Central Church in Collierville, TN, provides an online and face-to-face ministry of restoration and discipleship for Christians who are involved in habitual sexual sin, support for women, the silent victims of sexual sin involving men in their lives, and resources for families dealing with the onslaught of our sexually saturated world.
www.porn-free.org
Helping people discover the truth about pornography and "sexual" addictions.
www.christians-in-recovery.org
www.pfox.org
Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays (PFOX) provides outreach, education, and public awareness in support of the ex-gay community and families touched by homosexuality. PFOX has local chapters across the country.
www.techmission.org
TechMission is a non-profit social service organization. TechMission supports Christian organizations in using technology to transform vulnerable communities.
Helpful Ministries in the States
Desert Stream Ministries
Founded and directed by Andrew Comiskey, author of Pursuing Sexual Wholeness and the Living Waters program, this ministry brings the healing power of Jesus to men and women struggling with sexual and relational issues such as homosexuality, sexual addiction, and sexual abuse. Ministry groups are held throughout the U.S.
P.O. Box 17635, Anaheim, CA 92817-7635
714-779-6899
www.DesertStream.org
eXXit
This website provides resources such as a daily three-minute Bible study to help those struggling with pornography to stand strong and resist temptation.
www.eXXit.org
Faithful And True Ministries
This ministry features the resources of Mark Laaser, Ph.D., author of several books on sexual addiction.
6542 Regency Lane, Eden Prairie, MN 55344 www.FaithfulAndTrueMinistries.com
Focus on the Family
This ministry features the resources of author Dr. James Dobson and other Christian experts on a myriad of topics including marriage, the family, pornography, and unfaithfulness.
800-A-FAMILY (232-6459)
www.Family.org and www.PureIntimacy.org
Heart to Heart Counseling Centers
Features the resources of Dr. Douglas Weiss, a counselor, lecturer and author of such books as Faithful and True: Sexual Integrity in a Fallen World and 101 Practical Exercises for Sexual Addiction Recovery.
5080 Mark Dabling Blvd., Colorado Springs, CO 80918
719-278-3708
www.SexAddict.com
Overcomers Outreach
This Christian-based addiction ministry uses a 12-step support group model.
P.O. Box 2208, Oakhurst, CA 93644
800-310-3001
www.OvercomersOutreach.org
Pure Life Ministries
This ministry offers the resources of author Steve Gallagher, plus residential care, phone counseling, help for wives of men in sexual sin, and Men of Purity Weekends.
14 School Street, Dry Ridge, KY 41035
877-301-7566
www.PureLifeMinistries.org
Sought Out, Inc.
Based in Virginia, this ministry proclaims sexual redemption in Christ from pornography, adultery, and same-sex attraction.
P.O. Box 62019, Virginia Beach, VA 23466
757-631-0099
www.SoughtOut.org
Stone Gate Resources
This ministry features the resources of Dr. Harry Schaumburg.
11509 Palmer Divide Road, Larkspur, CO 80118 303-688-5680 www.StoneGateResources.org
Theophostic Prayer Ministries
Pastors, professional counselors, and lay ministers use this method of prayer counseling to bring the healing power of Jesus to people with a wide variety of emotional wounds.
P.O. Box 489, Campbellsville, KY 42719
270-465-3757
www.Theophostic.com
What If? Freedom Ministries
Phil and Bobi Naukam founded this ministry to assist others in escaping the grip of pornography.
P.O. Box 470252, Tulsa, OK 74147-0252
918-249-FREE (3733)
www.WhatIfMinistries.com
Further Reading
Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time, by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker with Mike Yorkey, Waterbrook Press. (This book also contains sections written especially for the wives of men who struggle with pornography.)
Addicted to "Love," by Stephen Arterburn, Servant Publications.
Breaking Free: Understanding Sexual Addiction and the Healing Power of Jesus, by Russell Willingham, InterVarsity Press.
Faithful and True: Sexual Integrity in a Fallen World, by Mark Laaser, Ph.D., Zondervan.
False Intimacy: Understanding the Struggle of Sex Addiction, by Dr. Harry Schaumburg, NavPress.
The Final Freedom: Pioneering Sexual Addiction Recovery, by Douglas Weiss, Ph.D., Heart to Heart Counseling Center.
At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry, by Steve Gallagher, Pure Life Ministries.
Ordering Your Private World, by Gordon MacDonald, Thomas Nelson Publishers.
Personal Holiness in Times of Temptation, by Bruce Wilkinson, Walk Thru the Bible Ministries.
Restoration Manual - A Workbook for Restoring Fallen Ministers and Religious Leaders. A step by step process of organizing a Restoration Team for a repentant pastor with practical recovery steps. This unique workbook will help the broken minister pick up the pieces of his life as it gives hope and direction.
You Can Become Porn Free - Learn how to stop the habit with God's help. Includes tips on avoiding porn, steps to breaking the habit, spiritual warfare points, deliverance, salvation steps, testimonial, links and much more!
Pure Intimacy - A resource for those struggling with online pornography
HelpandHope.org - Official home page for OASISS
Breaking the Power of Pornography - Pornography seems to make everything better--until it makes everything worse. Ironically, the journey to freedom and change is just the opposite. Everything usually gets worse before it gets better. The one thing a man can expect to encounter is the unexpected. It is a trademark of God to use the unusual to bring about His purposes.
Great Support System for Recovery - The support group participants, whatever their need, find the extra care and encouragement necessary to grow beyond the wounds of life's battles, the difficulties in family relationships, the bondage of addictive habits and behaviors, and the isolation caused by shame. OO meetings are filled with the faith, hope, and love that only God can provide through Christ
Sex Addiction - Presents Sex Addiction Recovery Resources
Home Site for Sex Addicts Anonymous - Sex Addicts Anonymous, SAA, is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other so they may overcome their sexual addiction and help others recover from sexual addiction or dependency.
Healing From Sexual Brokenness - Mastering Life Ministries is an interdenominational, non-profit Christian ministry. It exists in order to target areas of life where people are caught and deceived into unhealthy, dysfunctional life-styles that separate them from the power and blessing of God, and to equip the Church to redemptively minister to such people.
Our primary focus is sexual sin and brokenness, and related issues such as intimacy with the Father, performance orientation, anger management, etc. The tools of our ministry include film, television, and radio as well as seminars and publications that communicate the truth of Jesus Christ.
MORALITY IN MEDIA, INC is a national, not-for-profit, interfaith organization established in 1962 to combat obscenity and uphold decency standards in the media. It conducts public information programs to educate and involve concerned citizens, and maintains the National Obscenity Law Center, a clearinghouse of legal materials on obscenity law.
ObsenityCrimes.Org - A Resource for Educating the public and for Reporting possible violations of Internet Obscenity Laws.
The Good Shepherd Restoration Ministries - We're here to help both Believers and non believers overcome all forms of addictions; Alcoholism, Drug Addiction, Compulsive Gambling, Over-Eating, Compulsive Sexual Behaviors, as well as Co-Dependence and Love Addiction.
Overcomes Outreach
www.overcomersoutreach.org
For further information contact:
OVERCOMERS OUTREACH
P.O. Box 2208 Oakhurst, CA 93644 Phone Toll Free: 1-800-310-3001
Email: info@overcomersoutreach.org
Pornography Addictions:
www.parsonage.org
www.xxxchurch.com
Exxit: http://www.exxit.org/
Pornographie
Mal ganz abgesehen davon: Hast du dir jemals Gedanken darüber gemacht, welches persönliche Schicksal hinter den Lebensgeschichten der Pornostars steckt? Was sie dazu gebracht hat, das zu tun? Zumeist sind dies tragische Geschichten, die oft auch sexuellen Missbrauch (oder Missbrauch anderer Art) umfassen! Jason Evert hat einmal sinngemäß gesagt, wir müssen unsere Liebe zu diesen Pornostars vergrößern. Wir müssen uns verantwortlich für sie fühlen und sie nicht ausbeuten.
Papst Johannes Paul II. hat einmal sinngemäß gesagt, Pornographie sei nicht falsch, weil sie zuviel zeigt, sondern weil sie zuwenig zeigt. Sie reduziert Menschen auf ihre Körper und zeigt sie nicht so, wie Gott sie sieht.
Hast du dir jemals vorgestellt, wie unglaublich es wäre, wenn der erste nackte Körper des anderen Geschlechts, den du zu sehen bekommst, der deines Ehepartners wäre? Wenn deine Gedanken nicht durch unzählige Bilder nackter Körper oder Erinnerungen an vergangene Sexkontakte verschmutzt wären sondern sich ganz auf den Ehepartner konzentrieren könnten? Wollen wir das nicht zumindest unseren Kindern vermitteln?
(Quelle: Jason Evert)
Warum ist es so schwer, von Porno loszukommen?
Weil sich die Erinnerung an die gesehenen Bilder sowie die dabei ausgelöste körperliche Reaktion (bzw. die Reaktion in unserem Kopf) unauslöschlich in unser Gehirn eingebrannt hat und man sich oft noch nach Jahrzehnten an diverse Bilder erinnert. Es ist wie eine Bibliothek, in der man sich bei Bedarf bedienen kann.
Gerade in Zeiten, in denen wir ein "Schmerzmittel" brauchen, etwas, um zu vergessen, oder um Schmerz jeglicher Art, Langeweile, Ärger, Angstgefühle, Trauer, Depressionen oder was auch immer betäuben zu können, kommt die Versuchung wieder hoch, es doch mit der "bewährten alten Methode" - also Porno zu versuchen.
Dessen müssen wir uns bewusst sein und darauf achten, dass wir all diese Emotionen und die dahinterstehenden Bedürfnisse auf gesunde Art und Weise befriedigen, täglich beten sowie die Bibel lesen, regelmäßig zum Gottesdienst gehen und uns Rechenschaftspartner für all das, was in uns vorgeht und was wir tun, suchen. Ebenso ist es hilfreich, sich einen Aktionsplan für das "Worst-Case Szenario", also für den schlimmsten Fall (einen Rückfall) zurechtzulegen (Wen rufe ich an? Was tue ich dann sofort, um einen erneuten Rückfall zu verhindern?). Ebenso sollten wir unser gesamtes Leben durchforschen: Welche Freunde habe ich, welche Filme sehe ich mir im Fernsehen an, welche Homepages im Internet, welche Zeitschriften lese ich, welche Sachen oder Personen sind für mich sexuelle Versuchungen. Wenn wir das wissen, können wir auch nötige Maßnahmen treffen, um Rückfälle zu vermeiden.
The Net
Have a great week
Andre
Links National
kath.net: Wie Pornos die Jugend beeinflussen
Studien zu Pornographie, Internetsexsucht & Cybersex
Dr. med. R. Febres Landauro
http://dr-richi.com/german/index.php/de/
Kontaktdaten
Ich freue mich auf Ihren Anruf oder Ihre E-mail. Sie brauchen keine Überweisung.
In Österreich erreichen Sie meine Ordination unter +43 662 84 53 25.
In Deutschland erreichen Sie die Praxis unter +49 8651 979 38 29.
Nonntaler Hauptstraße 1
A-5020 Salzburg
Saint Mary Magdalene de Pazzi
Resources (Links)
CD-Set: Pure of Heart
For more useful resources please go to Pure Passion
American Family Association: Somebody's Daughter (DVD on porn)
OnePlace.com: Sexual Resolution with Joe Dallas
Out of the Darkness (DVD)
"Voll Porno!": Warum echte Kerle "Nein" sagen (Broschiert)
von Christoph Pahl (Autor), Bernd Siggelkow (Vorwort)
Broschiert: 198 Seiten
Verlag: Francke-Buchhandlung; Auflage: 1., Auflage (Januar 2010)
Sprache: Deutsch
ISBN-10: 386827166X
ISBN-13: 978-3868271669
100 ways to stay sober
1 ) Don’t forget the past.
2 ) Don’t overdo any "medication"
3 ) Stay away from acting out places, people, websites
4 ) Acknowledge a total slip will follow the first look, phone call, or turn you shouldn't make.
5 ) Listen and try to help another sex addict today.
6 ) Attend S-Group, AA, or other 12 Step regularly and get involved.
7 ) Help someone today even in the smallest way, not expecting something in return.
8 ) Think about the word "insanity" and "restore" in step 2.
9 ) Maintain a conscious contact with God
10) Ask what you can do for your group.
11) Pause!!! when insanity comes.
12) Ask God to come into your heart and mind in that pause.
13) Get a sponsor immediately!
14) Call your sponsor daily
15) Offer to help your sponsor with some thing
16) Visit a recovery house, or do some volunteer work.
17) Visit a depressed friend
18) Listen to learn
19) In problems, examine your part, first
20) Remember, your disease is incurable, progressive and fatal.
21) Do first things first.
22) Don't become too tired.
23) Eat at regular hours.
24) Use the telephone to call someone in recovery, when upset.
25) Be active - don't just sit around. Idle time will kill you.
26) Say the Serenity Prayer daily.
27) Change old routines and patterns that are not positive.
28) Don't become too hungry.
29) Avoid loneliness.
30) Practice control of your anger.
31) Air your resentments.
32) Be willing to help whenever needed.
33) Be good to yourself, you deserve it.
34) Slow down. Easy does it.
35) Get out of the "IF ONLY" trap.
36) Remember HOW IT WAS. Your last slip, the feelings etc.
37) Beware of how you will react beforehand. Expect your emotions.
38) Help another in his/her recovery, extend your hand, listen.
39) Try to turn your life and your will over to your Higher Power.
40) Avoid all mood-altering drugs, read labels on all medicines.
41) Turn loose of old negative ideas.
42) If you must go to a situation where there will be temptation, take a sober 12 step buddy with you.
43) Replace old acting out buddies with new SA/SAA buddies.
44) Read the AA Big Book slowly.
45) Try not to be dependent on another.
46) Be grateful and when not make a GRATITUDE list.
47) Don't feel sorry for yourself.
48) Seek knowledgeable help when you are troubled.
49) Review step ONE. "We were" is past tense, if we use our new tools.
50) Discuss a paragraph out of the Big Book with someone.
51) Turn your will over to God, knowing some action is needed by you.
52) Say Thank you at the end of each day.
53) Plant the "recovery" seed and accept the rest.
54) Don't try to test your will power Once a pickle always a pickle.
55) Live TODAY, not YESTERDAY, not TOMORROW.
56) Remember that God alone sets the element of QUALTIY and Quantity of time.
57) Remember your addiction is - cunning, baffling and powerful.
58) Give yourself credit for something good you accomplished today.
59) Love someone else first, then love yourself.
60) Share your experience, strength and hope.
61) Cherish your recovery.
62) Dump negative thinking.
63) Get plenty of "restful" sleep.
64) Stay sober for you - not someone else
65) Practice rigorous honesty with yourself and others.
66) Remember HALT, Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.
67) Forget the old saying "don't do this for one year"
Only God can measure your quality and quantity of time and sobriety.
68) Get a sponsor and use him/her to learn how to LIVE the 12 steps
69) Know that no matter what your problems, someone's had them before.
Don't be afraid to share, as a problem shared is one 1/2 solved.
70) Strive for progress not perfection.
71) When in doubt ask questions. The only stupid question is the one not asked.
72) Live step 11 with prayer and meditation.
73) Balance yourself.
74) Don't use other things obsessively as a maintenance program.
75) Learn to take spot check inventories.
76) Remember the fact that NOTHING will make you act out again.
77) Know that it’s okay to be human, to make mistakes.
78) Be kind to yourself. Don't be hard on yourself.
79) Take the disease seriously! It can kill you.
80) Know that whatever it is that's causing pain - it shall pass.
81) Smile at the worse problem and see what you can learn.
82) Don't give away more than you can afford too.
83) Don't stay inside too much. Get out, go somewhere!
84) Get a home group and attend it regularly.
85) Don't expect life to be all roses, even in sobriety. Without
problems there would be no use for our existence. 86) Remember step one
begins "WE" You are not alone.
87) Be willing to go to any lengths to stay and be sober.
88) Know that no matter how bleak and dark your past may be, it will get better!
89) Read the Promises in the Big Book page 83 and 84.
90) Don't be in a hurry.
91) Watch out for your EGO.
92) Protect your sobriety at all costs. Keep the light on you.
93) Learn to listen, not just hear. Be open-minded and nonjudgmental.
94) Don't use bad language and dishonor your Creator, Giver of Sobriety, God.
95) If the rest of the world looks bad, check yourself out first.
96) Show gratitude for your clean and sober time.
97) When times get tough.....go to tons of meetings and share!
98) Remember you can cut down any fear, into half or none, by discussing it with another individual.
99) Try to manage your money, budget yourself.
100) Look for those LIVING the 12 steps, not just talking them.
Quellenangabe
u.a.: Joe Dallas (go and get his books!)